First Exams

It has been a few weeks and school has been going pretty smoothly. Last Friday I had my very first Greek Exam to which I think i did considerably well. It's good to know that studying actually does help!! I also realized that up here, the students don't really compare or share their grades outright with each other. Coming from a community where grades matter quite a bit, and everyone loves to boast about their scores; I am now in a place where pride over a gpa is something silly. Still, that being said, I definitely have to thank God for giving me the patience to study so hard and finally pull through my first ever exam in Seminary. Coming up this Monday I will have my first OT Survey Exam which will also require lots of studying, so please keep me in your prayers.

The previous week was missions week and so Gordon Conwell invited different organizations to come share with us about missions. In particular, we had two speakers come in: Kenneth Bae and Gary Witherall. They both shared their experience on the mission field, and all I can think was how amazing it was that God used them in all the different places they went to. They both shared powerful stories of God's miracles and learning through things like forgiveness through the eyes of Christ. One thing that stood out to me through both of their sharing was a question that they both had to answer during their hardest struggle, and that was whether they were willing/ready to pay the cost to follow Christ wholeheartedly and completely. This really resonated with me on the grounds that I had to really ask myself the same question. While being in seminary, we study and learn all different things about theology and pastor-ship, but it didn't occur to me just how real serving God was, and how potentially hard/challenging it can be. When I had to ask myself whether I would be able to pay the cost to follow God as they did, I don't know if I were in their positions, I would be able to make the same decision. This reminded me of something Patrick Fung said during the Urbana'15 conference; "If Jesus is not Lord of all, then He is not Lord at all!" If I did not have Jesus as Lord of every aspect of my life, then was I really putting him to be Lord at all?? This really challenged me to think deeper about my call to serve, and don't get me wrong; I know God wants me here, but this really woke me up to the seriousness of serving God with my whole life. 

One more thing that I found myself struggling through was whether God was calling me to missionary work. In responding to God's call to come to seminary and be a pastor, part of me also heard God's calling to potentially be a missionary, but at the time I did not want to even consider this. I barely accepted God's calling to give up my life and follow him in being a pastor; I did not, at the time, even want to consider having to be sent to another country. After listening to the sharing of Kenneth Bae and Gary Witherall however, I felt God really stirring within my heart. However... instead of immediately getting on my knees and asking God for clarity, I instead decided to push it off. I asked God to come back to me and ask me later because I did not want to fall under the illusion of an emotional/spiritual high from listening to their sharing. I do not know what to expect, but this is definitely another area I would like to ask prayer for. If God does give me the calling, I know that the second thing I will need is the timing, which may not be until many years down the line. 

This week was reading week which is a week where seminarians have no classes, and instead are expected to study/catch up with all the reading/work that they might have not completed up to this point. For most students this is the golden time to write their papers and read up on books that they did not have time to, but for me ... since this is my first semester... I didn't really have all that much work to do. So instead of staying cooped up here on the Holy Hill, I had the opportunity to go back home with a few friends from Germany that were spending a semester in Gordon. My time back home was really refreshing and recharging. I was getting a little tired of the peace and quiet of Gordon Conwell, and so the excitement of the city was a nice change in atmosphere. I also had the chance to visit and hang out with my family and friends which was also a nice change from just straight up studying day in and day out. The best thing that happened above all was the chance to finally eat real food again!!! Since this was my first time dorming, I have been eating cafeteria lunches and cooking my own dinners... and there is no other experience that would make me miss home cooked meals/chinese food ever so much. I was able to eat my full and then bring up food to keep me alive!! 

(International Satanic Temple)It really looks like just any other house...

Yesterday me and a few friends decided to go on a prayer walk around Salem. We actually specifically went to the newly opened International Satanic Temple, which ... I have never ever even heard of before. I did not know that this  was something that was accepted, and so just being there and talking with the people was really eye opening. Me and my friends talked with the people that were working there, and all we could feel was sorrow for the people there. Not only did most of the things they said contradicting themselves and the "rules" of the "religion," but to us it was very clear that they were just pawns being used by the devil to spread his name. The employees claimed that they did not actually believe that a being like Satan existed, but they were using it as a symbol for what they believed. This in itself was so evident to us that the devil was using these people in their confusion of their beliefs to make himself known. This is something that I believe we all need to keep in our prayers because I can not even imagine how many more people will easily be roped into this belief.