Seminary has reached its end

This will most likely be my second to last update for my time up in seminary. This post will be a review of the month of April and May. I will make another post to review my last 3 years in seminary at a later date, stay tuned :).

School

Blessings:
- Finished all my papers and exams
- Graduated Seminary
- Had many bittersweet goodbyes

Prayer Requests:
- Continue studying and being diligent

Can't believe that my school year is finally over. This last month has been pretty hectic, but so many new milestones have been hit. The month of April was pretty much spent fine tuning the final papers that were due and finishing up my last two exams at seminary. In terms of academics, there wasn't too much on my plate in regards to school work. My exegesis paper for my Poetical Books class ended up being 40 pages long, and my Statement of faith paper was finished with over 270+ references to different scriptural texts. Needless to say, these were both great classes to finish off my seminary career. Besides the exams, April into May has been a time to say goodbye/see you next time. There were many "lasts" that I had before leaving Gordon Conwell. Whether it be my last time eating dinner with friends, meeting up for soul care, attending class, playing ping pong, etc. it was all enjoyable and yet bittersweet. Special shout out to my soul care group for all the ways we have encouraged one another throughout these last 3 years. We would try to meet every other week to share how things are going in our lives and pray for/encourage each other. As I move on to the next phase in my life, finally away from schooling, please keep me in your prayers. I want to continue reading, studying and learning even past seminary... even though I know that that is the last thing on my mind usually. But, I don't want to forget all that I have learned at Gordon Conwell and will need lots of prayer to keep being diligent.

Church

Blessings:
- CHARIS Retreat was a good time of rest and encouragement to reach out to those around us
- Basketball Tournament went really well!

Prayer Requests:
- Continued discernment for the pastoral search committee
- New leadership to step up in CHARIS fellowship

Things at Cross Bridge have also started winding down. As I prepared to move back to NYC, there were different "lasts" that happened here as well. Whether it be last time attending fellowship, last meetings, last basketball, etc. These were all bittersweet as well. Two events to note is the basketball tournament and the CHARIS Fellowship Retreat. The Basketball tournament was meant to be an outreach opportunity for Cross Bridge to get to know the community of Lexington. Honestly, God worked so much throughout the  planning process and the event itself. The first thing was the weather. The forecast predicted rain a week in advance, and ever since, we had been praying for decent weather to play in. After much prayers, and hands down, God's providence, that Saturday was a cloudy/sometimes sunny/windy day, and rain, there was not!! Second thing to give thanks for were all the volunteers that came out to help. Especially those who helped to plan this whole thing, because let's be real, I showed interest and shared the idea, but they were the ones that made it happen. Everyone pulled together and we all served humbly and joyfully! The third and last thing to give thanks for is the turnout of the event. We had started registration a little later than we had hoped, and within the first 2 weeks, only one team had signed up. All we could do was continue praying and encouraging others to sign up, so that's what we did. Another shout-out to the leaders who really stepped up to the task and did all that they could to spread the word and encourage people around Lexington to sign up. Before we knew it, in the last week before the tournament, teams started signing up, and on the night before the tournament, exactly 16 teams were signed up (which is how many we planned for). God showed providence through our faithfulness and the tournament ended up being a really good time to get to know those in our community. The second thing is CHARIS retreat. This retreat was a good time of rest, as well as being motivated and encouraged to reach out to those in our communities. Whether it be our coworker, friends or family members; we learned how to reach out to them and what the core values were behind living out a Christian life with them.

Family/NYC

Blessings:
- Continued support from friends and family
- Many friends from 3 stone were baptized

Prayer Requests:
- Unity in 3 stone

There was no reading week break during the months of April and May, so I didn't have the opportunity to take a break and head home. However, as most of you might know already, on April 20th, with the help of a few close friends, I proposed to Visalia and she said "Yes!" Thank you for all those who have kept us in your prayers and please keep us in your prayers as we take next steps in our lives together. For more information on how I did it or things like that, feel free to hit me up and ask me.

Final Comments
Blessings:
- After 3 long but short years, seminary is over and I'm back in NYC
- All that God has taught me

Prayer Requests:
- Interviews at churches
- Discerning God's will for my future

This last month of seminary has been pretty crazy. Even though, in terms of workload, it was not very heavy; but it was more emotionally heavy. Saying all those goodbyes were hard, all the while trying to figure out what will happen in the future job wise and relationship wise. However, without a doubt, God has taught me so much through my time here and, even more so, during these last few weeks, He has shown me that He will continue to provide for me daily. Please continue to pray for me, and stay tuned for my next update on my reflections for Seminary as a whole!

The End is Nigh

School

Blessings:
- Finishing up my 40+ page paper for Exegesis of Poetical Books
- Ping Pong Tournament has been a good source of community building

Prayer Requests:
- Finish up the last few weeks well
- Diligence to complete my last few assignments
- Be intentional about my relationships here at Gordon

The month of March has been one filled with adventure and fun, as well as hard work and diligence. Last update, I wrote about that super difficult paper that I had to write for class; well, I finally finished it!! It has ended up being ~40+ pages double spaced, definitely the longest paper I have ever written for any class and also the most difficult and time consuming. On the one hand, it was probably the hardest paper I've had to write in Seminary, on the other, I learned so much more than I could ever have expected to from Psalm 46. Psalm 46 has become a Psalm of encouragement and confidence for me as I wrestle with the near future that is to come. With school quickly coming to an end and next life plans slowly falling together, it is encouraging to know that in Psalm 46:11 "The Lord of Hosts is with us, The God of Jacob is our fortress." There is comfort, providence and protection from the Lord Almighty. Besides school work, similar to last year, I decided to organize a ping pong tournament with the students at Gordon Conwell to build community. This year, we have more participants than last year, and the ping pong tournament is in full blast. It has been a blessing to watch as people who never would have gotten the opportunity to meet or hang out with each other, build friendships over a simple sport that we all enjoy to play. Besides that, I want to ask for prayer on finishing up the last few weeks here well. I honestly cannot believe that my Seminary degree is about to come to an end, and each new checkpoint that I reach in my degree feels melancholic. Please pray that I wont get hit by senioritis and continue to diligently finish up the last few assignments that I have for class. The last thing I want to ask for prayer for is that I be intentional about the relationships I have made at school. It's only a matter of time before we all have to separate, and it is easy for me to unconsciously distance myself to prepare for separation from close friends and colleagues that have fought through Seminary with me.

Church

Blessings:
- Preached last week on an extremely difficult topic, but the Lord walked with me through it all
- Great leaders who are passionate about ministry

Prayer Requests:
- The pastoral search committee
- CHARIS as it transitions into a new season and batch of leaders
- Basketball 3 v 3 tournament to reach out the the community

Time at church has been a delight and wonderful as usual. This month was honestly dedicated mostly to the sermon that I had to preach a few days ago. The topic was one that required an extremely delicate approach, but was also one that needed truth spoken into it. I preached on the topic of what scripture has to say about same-sex sex, which is really a topic that focuses on what scripture has to say about same-sex behavior. Honestly, I didn't think I was the right person for the job, and maybe that's why this was such a humbling experience. In the past, I had never claimed to be an expert on this topic, but I always made a small claim to fame on the fact that I served with EPIC (Campus Crusade) in San Francisco during my sophomore year of college, and had experience ministering to people who were attracted to the same sex. However, I don't really think I knew what I was talking about then, nor really understood just how much I didn't understand or know. Throughout the preparation for this sermon, I realized my inadequacy and did the one thing I never thought I would do... I read up on the topic. I found and got recommendations for books on the topic and started researching and reading to understand more. I also spent the time to talk to many different people with differing views on the topic to understand where everyone was coming from. Most importantly, I talked with friends who personally struggled with being attracted to the same sex, and heard their struggles and their points of view as well. This was a process that took time, patience and an openness to the fact that I may be wrong. It is so easy to just read scripture or listen to people with a heart that already has my own decision on something. Cuz, then I'm just listening or learning so that I can further support my point or argue why I am correct. But as I approached this topic, I realized that I needed to come at this with an open heart that is willing to take off the "lens" that I view things from, and view things as they are, instead of what I already assume them to be. This is funny, because that's how we should be reading scripture... but we don't... So I am really glad that I had this opportunity to preach on this topic. Although, I know this is only the start, but I am glad that my church is willing to start the conversation. I want to also ask for prayer requests as Cross Bridge continues its pastor search. Praying that the Lord continues to grant discernment and providence for the next leader to take up a position at our church. I also want to ask for prayer for CHARIS (young adult fellowship) because in this next year, there will be a lot of change happening, especially in the leadership. The last prayer request item is or a 3 v 3 basketball tournament that me and a few other basketball enthusiasts started in order to reach out to the immediate community of Lexington. Pray that people from around the neighborhood would come and that we can have a good time together and give those at our church an opportunity to enjoy sports with people in their community.

Family/NYC

Blessings:
- Went to Atlanta for a Bachelor Party
- Went to Buffalo for a wedding
- Parents came back from Hong Kong safely

Prayer Requests:
- My brothers continue to discern God's will for them
- Unity and faithfulness for 3 Stone ministry

In the middle of March, during the second reading week, I had two action packed weekends back to back. At the beginning of the reading week, I was blessed with the opportunity to go to Atlanta with a bunch of amazing guys to celebrate with our soon to be married friend. I honestly went in with no expectations, but left feeling refreshed, fatter, and encouraged. Besides all the fun, craziness and food that we had, the trip was also filled with great conversations and was very edifying overall. There were definitely some weird moments where things just seemed to "blow up" out of no where, but these guys handled it well, and we all played our part on this trip. It was a nice get-a-way from the busyness of school work or work work, and I'm glad to have been a part of it. The following weekend, I was blessed with the opportunity to attend a friend's wedding all the way in Buffalo. Even though it was a 7-8 hour drive, time flew by because I was in great company. Me and Visalia were blessed by our good friends Monica and Peter who drove us up and engaged in great conversations with us. We always end up touching on a multitude of different topics, and since I was preparing my sermon for April 7th, we ended up also touching on the topic of Same-Sex attraction and behavior. As we discussed, it was really encouraging and helpful to hear the different perspectives that were shared, as well as the importance that this topic played in our society and ministry nowadays. Besides that, the wedding was a wonderful time to celebrate the union of two of our good friends and a fun time to just enjoy the escape from the city. During the end of our trip, I also got to visit Binghamton, which I had never been to before, but was a fun opportunity to experience a little part of where Visalia spent a good chunk of her life at. In terms of actual time spent in New York, it wasn't that much, but in terms of spending time with people, I had an amazing time. I now want to just ask for prayer requests for my brother's to continue discerning God's will for them. As they get close to wrapping up their college degree, pray that God provides for them and guides them. I also want to ask for prayer for my home church, 3 Stone. Pray for unity and faithfulness especially with all the changes that are too occur soon.


Final Comments
Blessings:
- Interviews with potential churches to serve at
- Time with the Lord
- Finishing up another chapter of my life

Prayer Requests:
- A new chapter of my life is about to begin, one where I will have to be going through a whole lot of change again
- Transitioning
- Discernment for churches and future

As I approach the end of my seminary career, there are just so many things going through my head. I am still trying to wrap my head around the fact that life is about to change drastically and I am no longer going to be a student at this school. Instead, I will have to go out into the world and engage with people at a church that a may or may not be familiar with. On one hand, it is terrifying to consider, but on the other, it is sooo exciting. I can't wait to do ministry and to serve in a new context, but I also don't want to leave the comfort and bubble that is Gordon Conwell. It is going to be a bitter sweet departure, but praise God for providing the next steps for me. There are churches that I am currently in conversation with to potentially serve at so please keep that in your prayers! During this last month, I have also been recognizing the importance of spending time with the Lord. I have been trying out this new practice of spending the last 30 minutes or so of my day in meditation with the Lord and not looking at my phone afterwards. It has been an interesting experience, and I can say that it definitely helps to reflect on my day and recognize all that the Lord has been doing. As I reflect, I also recognize that God has continued to bless my relationship with Visalia. It has been a very busy season of life for the both of us, and it has become harder and harder to find time together, but this just reminds me of the priorities in my life. Being in this relationship has continued to teach me where my priorities should be and how to be intentional about each step. My first priority is always first and foremost to God, then to my family and loved ones, then to the places He has called me. Especially in this time of busyness, I'm reminded of the importance of setting aside time and being considerate of the stress of the many things that Visalia may be balancing. At the same time, I am learning how to recognize conflicting values we may have and am learning how to have conversations that ultimately point back to Christ. Overall, it has been one heck of a month, and there is just so much uncertainty still in the air about the future. Thank you for having kept up with me for all this time, and stay tuned for my last update for Gordon Conwell next month!!

Free time gives birth to busy busy busy???

School
Blessings:

- Workload seems to be pretty low besides 2 really big papers to write
- Getting the opportunity to be more present at school
- Having good conversations

Prayer Requests:
- Diligence to start working on my assignments early
- Wisdom on how to spend the rest of my time remaining up here

During the month of February, which was actually quite short, nothing really much happened. There was only two weeks where I had class up here at Gordon Conwell, so there wasn't really all that much to deal with. On top of only taking two classes, I realized that I actually got to spend a lot more time talking with people and just enjoying the community and fellowship. Last year, I wasn't able to spend as much time with the people on campus because I was working with Instacart and doing ministry at church, but with the lessened class load and the blessing of working in the mail-room, life has been very different. Because of this, I have been taking more time to reflect on what my role is for this year. The last two years have been a little different. The first year was me understanding my identity and being willing to learn from those around me. The second year was still me learning, but my identity as a student had solidified and I was also helping those who came in their first year. Now that I am in my third year, I realized I have been taking more time to care for those who are new and old, and building on past relationships that I have built up. On another note, even though this semester is supposed to be my most free semester, I have somehow ended up piling many different extra-curricular things into my schedule. On top of the two papers and mail-room work that I have at school, I have also set up a ping pong tournament, like last year, to help build community. This still doesn't seem that bad until I actually started working on one of my two papers. The paper is an Exegesis paper of Psalms 46:9-11, (Exegesis: Basically studying scripture and trying to extrapolate information from the text in the context that it was meant to be in) and it is probably the hardest paper I have had to write for seminary so far. The paper usually involves a 12 step process, and having just started it this week in complete confusion; it took me 8 hours just to finish the first 2 steps. Thankfully they were the most confusing steps that I had the least experience with, but that was definitely a process that I didn't expect to be so time consuming. Hopefully I will remain diligent and keep working hard on that paper ><.

Church
Blessings:
- Preached last week, and the Spirit was moving powerfully in the audience
- CHARIS is on chapter 4 of Holy Conversations, and people are slowly starting to have conversations with their conversation partners
- Opportunity to serve in CB Core and work alongside other passionate leaders

Prayer Requests:
- Continued Pastoral Search for youth pastor and Senior English Pastor
- CHARIS members continue to grow in discipleship and openness to what the Lord is prompting them with
- Faithfulness and consistency in my discipleship relationships

Church has been great and smooth. CHARIS has been moving forward with our study into Holy Conversations, and it is encouraging to see us going out and talking to people about our faith. I was also blessed with the opportunity to preach last week, which is always a humbling and learning experience. Every time I preach, I realize that God presses on my heart how much I myself need to reflect and am impacted by the things that I am sharing about in my sermon. It's funny because I'm preaching the sermon, hoping that the Holy Spirit convicts the people who hear it, but God swings it around and hits me first. The topic I preached on was targeted towards all of those who were children... which means all of us, because all of us are offspring of parents. God really pressed upon my heart how big of a deal this was for me, and how important this sermon was in realizing my understanding into bridging the gap between Christians children and their parents. Inter-generational ministry is something that weighs heavily in my heart, and this was a wonderful opportunity to learn and recognize the immensity of the problem that has been forged through years and years of miscommunication. During this time, I also have been blessed with the opportunity to serve in Cross Bridge Core team. It is, honestly, the first time I have served in a role that makes decisions for the whole English side of the church, and the experience has been super humbling and encouraging. Humbling to walk alongside those who have years of experience serving and loving their community, while continuing to pursue the Lord's will for the church. Encouraging to work alongside those who are passionate for the ministries that God has placed them in, and willingness to work alongside one another. Although I am blessed with the opportunity to lead and serve with them, I feel like I am just being blessed with the opportunity to learn from them and work through the different struggles with them.

Family/NYC Life
Blessings:

- Went back for February Reading week
- Tried to help my brother with his resume
- Spent time with Visalia and Old Friends

Prayer Requests:
- Continued reminder that my first ministry is always to my family
- Discernment and wisdom on next steps in NYC

During the month of February, I was blessed again with the opportunity to head home for a whole week. This week was first filled with a fun little adventure with Visalia and a childhood friend to explore a new city. It was a nice chance to just get away from all the busyness of work and experience and different culture that we were not used to, and probably won't go back to. After that, I spent most of this break at home with my family instead of always going out every night. It was a nice time of just enjoying the presence of my family, while trying to be intentional about the relationships that I had there. Praise God that I was also able to go on a little date with Visalia and we went to eat at Ikinari steak house... and ... I know why God has placed me on this earth... it was to eat steak. But on another note, I am constantly reminded of the blessing that she has been in my life, and how much God has grown the both of us throughout the last two years. Prayers for many more years to come, and for wisdom on our future. In terms of moving back to NYC, that has been pretty much assumed, but now comes the fun part of applying for churches. God has been extremely gracious in blessing me with different people to introduce me to different places, so now... I just gotta trust that the Lord will open the door He wants me to go through, and close the ones He doesn't.


Final Comments
Blessings:
- A semester of reflection
- A semester of filled schedule

Prayer Requests:
- Fear of the unknown future to come
- Finishing Seminary well
- Finishing my time at CBCGB well

Like I have been saying, this is a very different semester than all the other ones I have had. Although I am supposedly more free, I have actually ended up packing on a bunch more things to do. Along with my school work and mail room work, I have also continued the 3 discipleships that I have at church and school, continued teaching Sunday School at church, serving with CMC youth core team, meeting with a conversation partner weekly, keeping up with my relationships in nyc, and keeping up with relationships here in Gordon. Surprisingly, my daily schedule has become jam packed with different activities or meet ups. On the one hand, it is slightly tiring to run from one place to another; but on the other hand, I realize that I have been really chill up here in MA, and this is the first semester where I get to actually be busy again. It seems like a nice preparation to go back to NYC. At the same time, I have been trying to build up new habits with my daily devotions as well as recognizing the importance of taking time to step away from all the busyness and just reflect on what the Lord has done and is doing in my life. As I prepare for the future to come, please continue to keep me in your prayers because... I wish I knew where I was going to or what I would be doing exactly, step by step... but that isn't as possible as I wish. Thank you all again for just taking the time to check up on how I am doing, and feel free to hit me up, I'd love to catch up with y'all!!

2019 Beginnings

So, I've decided to change up the format of my updates. I apologize for all the word vomit that usually happens in these blogs, but after listening to some feedback on these posts, I want to try and incorporate a bit more structure. I will still have a space for just my thoughts, but I will also try to list out some key points; for those of you who are looking to pray for me. The key points will be listed first, and if you want to read my thoughts, just scroll down haha. Thank you for your willingness to read and see how I am doing, and thank you for all the prayers!!

School 
Blessings:
- Finished all the course work!
- Only two courses left in my seminary degree!!
- Got a job in the mail room
- New suite mate!

Prayer Requests:
- Finish my classes well, be diligent with the last bits of work
- Be intentional about my relationships at Gordon

During January, half of it was spent up at Gordon Conwell taking my winter class, Pastoral Ministry, while the other half was spent back home in NYC. The pastoral ministry class was a real eye opener, and affirmed many difficulties and hardships that came with becoming a pastor. Ever since I first stepped into seminary, I have always been wondering when I was going to learn about officiating weddings and funerals, doing baptisms and communion, and all the other pastoral duties. This was the class that had the culmination of all of those topics and it was really helpful and practical to learn about it and talk about it with out prospective/current pastors. After the class, I had a chance to head home for one and a half weeks before coming up to start my last spring semester at Gordon Conwell. With the coming of this new semester, I only need 2 more classes to graduate, Systematic Theology III and Poetical Books (Exegesis). Seeing as I usually have a four classes and one being a new language, this semester is really not too difficult. If anything, having less classes has given me the opportunity to focus more on serving at church, being intentional about my relationships at school, and discerning God's will for my next steps. This semester, I was also blessed to work in the mail room at school. I may have mentioned how I used to do instacart, but that really killed the extrovert in me because I would just be doing things on my own. Working in the mailroom has given me the opportunity to stay on campus more often, and interact with other students. One last thing of importance to note is that I now have a new suite mate!! After one semester of being alone in my dorm room, I now have a new friend from Japan. It has been a a great opportunity to learn how to show hospitality and to be saved from my boredom of living alone.

Church

Blessings:
- Led a workshop on suicide prevention with youth counselors at CBCGB
- CHARIS started going through "Holy Conversations," and it has been very encouraging to see everyone learning to listen and talk with their friends

Prayer Requests:
- Continued Pastoral Search for youth pastor and Senior English Pastor
- CHARIS members continue to grow in discipleship and a passion for evangelism


Things at Cross Bridge have been going really well. During one of the weeks in January, I had the opportunity to lead a workshop on suicide prevention with the youth counselors. This was something that I had wanted to do ever since I took the suicide prevention class in the summer of 2018. The topic is so pertinent and isn't discussed enough, so it was a really great opportunity to share the insights I learned during the class, and to walk together in wrestling with suicide. The young adult fellowship that I serve with, CHARIS, has also started going through "Holy Conversations," which is a workbook that goes through 12 sessions and teaches us how to have spiritual conversations with our friends and neighbors. The core of the book is learning how to listen to others and actually have a conversation with them instead of dropping the gospel and walking away. The book goes topic by topic which helps to give some guidelines on what to discuss, but all in all, it is an opportunity to get to know each other's spiritual beliefs and share the gospel in a way that isn't forced.


Family/NYC Life
Blessings:
- Went back to New York to spend Chinese New Year with family
- Had more opportunities to talk with my brothers
- Spent time with old friends and with Visalia

Prayer Requests:
- Continue building and rebuilding my relationship with my brothers
- Being intentional about my relationships in NYC

Things at home have been different. Through difficult circumstances, my parents have started fostering a 3 y/o little girl, which means my house now has a child running around. It is an interesting concept and even more interesting to be a part of this journey because me and my brothers have basically grown up and can take care of ourselves. In the time where my parents finally get to focus more on their ministry and freedom, they have chosen instead to pour into the life of this little girl. If anything, this has shown me what it looks like to have a heart of humility, responsibility, sacrifice, and submission to the Lord's will. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult this can be, but at the same time, it is so "my parents," to do something like this. Besides that, during this month, I have been blessed with the opportunity to build closer relationships with my brothers. Through a series of events, I can see God working and in our relationship and mending it bit by bit. Along with all this, January was a good time spent with old friends that came back from work. In the past, I have been wrestling with going back to New York. Whenever I went back for reading weeks, it would seem like I was a stranger in my own hometown because everyone I knew was in a different place. Whether it be a change in friend groups or jobs or availability, New York felt like a stranger. But as I have been discerning God's will for my future, and the direction being back to New York, God has really shown me that there is still community there and there is more to get to know. My relationship with Visalia has also been going well. We were able to spend a decent amount of time with each other during this break. Doing long distance (shorter than most people, but still far enough that I can't just visit whenever I want) has been hard and one thing we recognized, was the importance of being intentional about our time together.

As I saw the rainbow, I reflected upon God's
promise with all of Creation and His faithfulness

Final Comments
Blessings:
- God's faithfulness in all things

Prayer Requests:
- Discernment for churches that I am applying to
- Discerning next steps in my relationship with Visalia
- Be diligent + faithful in all that He places before me

Last but not least is the little bit of reflection that I have been doing during this term. God has really shown me that what I need to do is rely on Him. It seems silly, but there are times where I wonder where God is going to place me for work and I forget to pray about it. Sometimes I will be trying to figure out the future and plan everything, but I lose sight of the discernment process with God. Somehow or another, I try to be more self-sufficient, but in doing so, I realize how helpless I am to really figure things out. Thankfully, God has been constantly faithful and has shown me time and time again that He is preparing me slowly for things to come. I'm still not really sure about what the future may hold, but it is comforting to know that God will provide. On that same line of thought, God has really been placing it on my heart to be diligent and faithful. I used to tell other people about how faithful patience doesn't mean sitting on our butts and twiddling our fingers while waiting for God to work. What it means is that we have to faithfully do the best that we can, and wait upon God for the results. To recognize that our work and performance isn't what matters, but it is a proof of our faith. Works comes out from our faith, and I've been a little too laid back. God has been pressing me to be more proactive in my relationships and with relying on Him for what comes next after seminary!